the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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