Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
