last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Randomize
