went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
