new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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