Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Randomize
