life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
