thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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