her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
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