can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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