He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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