so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
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