Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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