Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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