you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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