If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize