How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
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