All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
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