I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
