True but thats because hes a fetus.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
