Ambien. No doubt about it.
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize
