We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
