I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
i need some magic done to my vagina
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Randomize
