Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
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