I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Randomize
