Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
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