that's an acceptable place to lick
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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