I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
When are your genitals available?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
