Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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