my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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