Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Randomize
