Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
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