you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
