i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
