I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Randomize
