Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
vagina is talking i cant
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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