Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
