dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
