Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
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