I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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