so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Randomize
