Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
