I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Randomize
