I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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