her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
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