Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Randomize
