im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Randomize