college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I am available for nakedness
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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