A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
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