I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
