We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
