my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
